Thursday, March 23, 2006


Hmmmm... so, it is taking China 4 months to match the families with May LID's. That is so perplexing to me. I guess I am sitting here wondering if this is the beginning of the end of international adoptions from China. It seems that it is working it's way towards a grinding halt. If this time schedule continues it could be a YEAR before we receive our referral. I just can't wrap my brain around it.

Now, I am far from a rocket scientist. I don't profess to even have a glimmer of an idea as to the working environment in China. I do believe that the CCAA is working hard. I am just so darn frustrated.

I know we needed this extra time to recoup financially from all of the unexpected expenses that hit us all at once, but MAN I am ready to see some progress. On some levels it feels as if referrals have not even come in for the past few months. I feel like I am in a haze. I worry that something will happen and we won't be able to bring Madeline home. I am feeling insecure.

Okay... I know, I know... all will happen in the right time. I know we will be matched with the perfect baby.. .but I am just really worried that I am starting to be truly depressed. I am not really sure how to make this better.

On a happier note... I am so blessed and truly lucky to be surrounded by a husband who loves me dearly and two boys who think they have the best mom in the world. They help soooo much. I think sometimes the wait is more difficult when I look into my sweet, Riley's face as he sleeps. I wish he could have come home sooner. I don't want Madeline to be without her family for even one second longer than necessary.

So... the wait continues. Our paperwork was sent to China 8 months ago and logged in 7 months ago. I am ready for some forward movement!!!!

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