Referral Day!!

I LOVE Referral Day!! Today is referral day for families logged in from 6/29/05-7/13/05! Congratulations! It has been so exciting watching families post their good news! The babies are just beautiful. Some of them seem to be a little older than the babies we have seen the past few months. I am just so happy for all of the families who were able to see their babies for the first time today.

Our agency had 44 referrals received including TWO sets of twins!! Yup, you read that right. TWO SETS OF TWINS. They received one set of twins last month and now 2 sets!! I can't imagine how amazing that must be for those families. I hope we will be able to see their pictures very soon.

I love referral day !! It is truly the best day of the month!!

July 13th

This past month there were rumors swirling EVERYWHERE of possible cut-off dates. It all began with the all of July in July. That didn't seem likely, but BOY I loved the sound of it. Then came the July 13th rumor. It was deflating. Then we all heard about July 20th or even the 22nd. Someone even mentioned July 27th. I was guarding my heart. Could these later dates even be possible???

Well, July 13th is the date. YUCK!! I am happy referrals are on their way, but I feel NO closer to seeing my baby's face this month than I did last month. I know that may seem odd.... I mean, progress is progress... but with this August 24th LID, it could still be October or worse. Okay, may not worse but October.... I just keep thinking each month it will get better... things will pick up.... a feeling of progress will happen. Nothing, nada, zilch, zero... this feels like no progress at all.

I feel like I really don't have the right to feel this way. I think about the people who have July 14th LID's. They were so close yet must sit and wait another month. The scary thing is that no one has any clue who will be included next. You can safely say July 14th... but after that there is no way of knowing. CCAA could do only 5 days again like they did a few months ago. They could do an entire month. They could do... who knows. Never in a million years did I think this wait would be so torterous.

Last time the wait was difficult. This time... difficult isn't a strong enough word. I can't even bring myself to really prepare for baby because WHO KNOWS???? I keep thinking as I watch the ages of babies referred each month I am getting a better idea of what to expect. -but gosh, who knows. I actually dreamed that we were referred a 6 year old!! Our family has miracles happen with our c hildren. We know this. Heck, I think I would just like this miracle to be a perfect little baby girl... but with our track record, who knows.

Waiting for baby.... is not fun.

Come on August!! We need BIG numbers!!!

Eleven Months Since LID

Really, what else is there to say??? Eleven months. ELEVEN months! Today it is exactly 11 months since our dossier was logged in. Two days ago it was a YEAR since we were DTC. I am a little amazed. Eleven months since LID. WOW!

What Will the New Week Bring?

There are so many wonderful people waiting for their referrals right now. I am really, really, really hoping they hear so very good news this week. This last week was truly a roller coaster ride of rumors and speculation.

I am thinking it would be FANTASTIC to hear a nice big batch of referrals were coming out. I am thinking if CCAA could get a good 20-25 days in this month it would be such a breath of fresh air.


I have also been following the website of a family who has had a miserable last month. They had to turn down their referral since the child has some serious medical issues they were just not able to handle. They have been waiting and waiting to hear some good news about their referral. I can't imagine the pain they have been going through.

I am heading in to work this week to bring some of my materials in. I am so ready to get all of this out of the garage. I am not ready to head back to work. I am nervous as all get out about starting this new year. A new district, a new school, new co-workers, new, new, new... so much unknown. Maybe if I can get the work stuff so it just feels right I will handle this wait better. Who knows....

Well, I this entry is more of just a thought organizer... and a big ole' wish for a lot of happy families this week. COME ON REFERRALS!! COME ON CCAA!! There are a lot of wonderful people waiting to meet their babies!!!

And the wait goes on.....

Reminds me a little of a bad Sonny and Cher song.. and the wait goes on... and the wait goes on and on....

Yes, I am old enough to have sat and watched the Sonny and Cher show. Heck... I wished I could grow my hair all the way to my butt back then. My mother was NO fun!! She cut my hair into an UGLY pixie!! Yikes!!


Can you tell the wait is starting to cause my little brain to go in a million directions? Actually, all of these directions, yet I am constantly pulled back to this crazy wait.

I have been reading the sites... trying to work my voodoo magic on the bad rumors to make them go away. I am finding out rather fast that my voodoo magic is not that effective... OR it is really backfiring on me. It seems the good rumors are quickly disappearing. I sit back and reflect on the carefree days of bliss when folks were chanting "All of July in July!" Where have those days gone?? I have continued the chant, though I think I am singing a solo now. Deep down inside I know it is only a pipe dream... like growing my hair to my butt was... but gosh darn it... I can't let go of the dream!! I think I will just build a little protective cocoon around my dream for as long as possible.

Okay... now that I am safe and sound inside my dream.... I am going to add to my chant.. All of August in August??? hmmm.... that would be nice.

I think, besides the obvious frustration with the unexpected lengthy wait, my frustrations come from knowing our dossier was sent to China on July 22nd and then... unexplainably not logged in until August 24th. I feel a little cheated. I know... blah, blah, blah... everything has a reason, it will happen when it is supposed to, she isn't ready.. AHHHHHH!!!!!!!

So... retail therapy helped for a few weeks. Secret pal shopping helped scratch the itch for a few days. Sitting in her half decorated room helps ease the frustrations for a few hours. I am ready. I know it isn't my turn, but I am ready.

I am ready for a few things....
* predicitablity
* a completed nursery
* July referrals
* no more rumors, just facts
* to win the lottery so I will be independently wealthy
* to see my daughter's picture
* to know I will have a daughter and not wonder if another surprise will happen
* to start moving forward again instead of running in place


I am ready. Bring on referrals.

Summer Fun

Rambling

Okay, I am guessing the reason for my nonstop rambling lately is because I am so excited that our referral may actually be sometime soon. So many thoughts, ideas, worries are bouncing around in my brain. Maybe if I list a few that will help.

• All of July in July? -would be very nice... but probably won't happen
• Referral for us in September? -could actually happen
• Is it too early to really start shopping for travel?
• Is there any chance whatsoever that there will be a baby shower this time? I really don't think so.
• Will we really be able to take the boys with us to China?
• How many lists is too many??? I probably have no less that 10 lists started.
  
• Will my parents be able to travel with us? I hope so!!
• Should I start buying real baby things like the carseat or should I wait?
• I have to start ignoring people who make incorrect statements as fact and not feel compelled to make it "right"
• A second surprise boy has never happened. Don't obsess.
• I have to shop for back to school and back to work clothes... not motivated

By the way... this is such an exciting time. I love the excitement of the speculation. That being said it is probably a good thing that I will be away from the computer for about a week. I am so obsessed with all things adoption right now! ( I love every minute of it!)

You Should Travel to China

China can satisfy your craving for many travel opportunities in one trip. You can hang out in modern Shanghai, walk along the great wall, or visit sacred mountains.

What Asian Country Should You Visit?

Let's Get This Party Started

I am so excited for the next referrals!! I think I am going to get a big party hat to wear as I sit and rejoice this next bunch!

Maybe I am crazy... but I have found this crazy optimism today. I am thinking big numbers and good things for July!

So many people I follow online are due to get referrals this time. It should be fantastic!! From what I have learned about these amazing people... they are going to make awesome parents. They are filled with such life and love that their children are going to be so happy!

I know referral time is a little over two weeks away... but WOW... this next batch should be exciting!! With our August LID... our time is starting to really feel within reach!!

This is the "doable" part of the wait.... when the excitement and wonder starts to grow. I know my little Madeline is alive and waiting for me in China. I know we have so many loved ones watching over her.... just like they did for the Ri-ster.

I am so ready to get this party started!!!!!!!!!!!

Is it too soon?

Okay... is it too soon to hope for some rumors? I mean, I know it is... but BOY a good, juicy rumor would hit the spot right now. I am thinking June 29th - July 25th would be nice. How about July 26th - August 24th (my LID) in August?

I know... it is a dream, but it sure would be nice. Actually, right now a September referral would be heavenly. It seems that no one has any clue how this will all unfold. I just keep thinking.... we have had such a slow moving train the past 6 months... an unexpected increase would sure be nice.

I am so excited about seeing my child's picture sometime soon. I can't wait to see that beautiful face that I have wondered about. I can't wait to find out how old she is, where she is living, how much she weighs.... so many things. Will she be as cute as I imagine?? Could she be as beautiful as my boys? Will she melt her daddy's heart at the first glance??

This journey, for all of it's twists and turns has been amazing. I love my baby already. I hold her in my heart wherever I go. I whisper sweet messages into the wind to her, in hopes they will float all the way to China and land lovingly in her heart. I smile at the thought of her laughing.

What a lucky, lucky person I am.... three miracles... wow

Impatient isn't a strong enough word

I had been doing so well. I had been feeling like things were really starting to move. The referrals last week were so exciting! I love watching families form. It is just such a special and happy time. Coming down from that excitement I dealt with a few personal moments of frustration with all of the discussions about boys. Now, we are back to the unknown wait.

I am so ready for some predicatability during this wait. We have been logged in over 10 months. Okay... that I can accept. Heck, I have no choice but to accept it. The part that bothers me is just not knowing what China will do next. I can not, for the life of me, understand the magnitude of the job CCAA has. It is daunting. I just wish we had some solid information regarding this continued wait.

• Will the wait continue to lengthen?
• Is there any idea of how many days of LID's CCAA is hoping to match each month?
• Will repaired or minor SN children be referred to families who requested NSN?
• Will we be referreda daughter or a surprise son again? (Okay, that one is personal.)
• What are the reasons, clear and concise, for the extended wait?
• Have domestic adoptions really increased to the point that it is causing this extended wait?

I know everyone waiting is going through this. Maybe a larger part of my frustration comes from knowing that it took over a month from DTC to LID. We could have been logged in, in July, if the LID process had not taken so long. Now, we are still so far off even though we are relatively close, date wise. There are 56 calendar days from June 29th to August 24th. In the past that would mean we would come second. Now... we could , who knows!!

Okay... I have decided.... if I see a tiara... I am getting myself one! I have waited long enough.

Retail theraphy for me as well as for baby is a GOOD thing!!

Passing the Time

Well, it is now time to head back to work at Raymond James Stadium, home of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Normally, I only work NFL events. I just couldn't pass up working the Kenny Chesney concert. This is going to be a hoot.

1. It is going to be hot as Hades!!
2. There are certainly going to be some interesting belt buckles.
3. I am interested in hearing Carrie Underwood. Should she be the American Idol?
   
4. How much beer can country music fans consume, anyways?
5. Hopefully the money will be good!
   
6. Do you think there will be inappropriately dressed ladies?

I haven't worked at the stadium since.... hmmm, January. I am sure I will be completely beat by the end of the event. All that walking and working... I am out of shape! Also, with being on summer break from work, makes me all the more lazy right now! WOW!!


On the flip side..... I officially report back to work THIS MONTH!! YIKES!! It is hard to believe the summer is just slipping away. Hopefully, with getting back to the stadium and the school year starting in a month, it will help to pass the time during this horrendous wait!