Sunday, March 18, 2007

One Week Down.... :-(

I have completed my first week back to work. I have to say... I was miserable. I am trying very hard to find the bright side. As crazy as this may sound, Monday was the best day. Maybe it was the easiest since the boys were with Madeline at my parents house. There was no school for students that day. It made for an easier attempt at a transition back into my class with a day to figure out what had gone on in my three month absence.

Tuesday through Friday were BAD. As the week progressed Madeline got more upset each morning. This made for a very stressful time for me. She has spent the weekend attached t co my hip and cries when she doesn't have me in her field of vision. She wakes up during naps and nighttime to make sure I am still here. It breaks my heart to see her struggling so.

DH and I have started to talk about different options for next school year. DH is hoping to receive a promotion over the summer. The pay raise would allow me to only work part time. I would try to find someone to job share with me. Job share would allow me to work only mornings or afternoons. Half days would be much better. I am also going to continue to look for other work options. Maybe I can find a position for less money where Madeline can be too. A new preschool is opening up in our neighborhood. I just don't know.

I know that this week just has to be better. I have 9 more work weeks until Summer Break. This is 10 weeks altogether. I just keep telling myself I have to make it to the end of the school year. I never thought this would be so difficult. I was home about 4 months when James was born. As terrible as this may sound, he was oblivious. I was home for 6 months with Riley. He turned three and went to school. He REALLY needed to get into school daily. He was so developmentally delayed... not to mention the language and articulation problems. He NEEDED instruction and services from people qualified to help him. Now, he is on target and ready to head off the Kindergarten in the fall.

Madeline is just not ready for me to be away from her. Maybe this week will be better. If not, then something is going to have to give. Jerry will be home with her the following week and then I am off for a week. If things are horrible... we will just have to figure something out. Madeline deserves it.

1 comment:

B-squared said...

Oh Mary, I'm sorry this is so hard. Trying to balance work, motherhood, and life in general is not for the faint of heart! I hope things continue to get better as you make it through the rest of the school year, and I hope you are able to find a good solution for next year. I haven't been back to work since we got K, but she has a hard time when I leave her even for an hour during church or whatever. She's very clingy for the next day or so later. So it breaks my heart to know what you and your daughter are going through. Hang in there! I'll say a prayer for you all!