Alone in a Room Full of Sisters

One of the things I love is being a member of my sorority, AOII. This is something that has always been a source of great pride to me. That being said, I am far from your stereotypical sorority girl. I never have been. Many are surprised to learn that I am in a sorority. I find this interesting and funny.

In 1985 I headed off to college. I was young, enthusiastic and ready to face the world. I moved into the dorm and started to meet people and make friends. One of the friends I made was VERY interested in joining a sorority. She wanted to go through Rush but didn't want to go it alone. She asked me if I would go with her. I said I would, but had absolutely NO interest in pledging. I was going to support my friend. I did not see myself as someone a sorority would be interested in. I was very insecure, really. I didn't think any of these groups would find me "worthy" of being a member.

Much to my shock I was asked back to different groups during each round of rush parties. I couldn't believe it. When it was time to go to the last round of parties, Prefs, I was now going through Rush alone. My friend had decided this wasn't for her... but I kept going. I went to two Pref parties, AOII and Chi O. Each group was very different, but special in their own way. I remember looking at my selection card after Prefs and wondering what would happen next. I selected AOII as my first choice. After getting to know the girls, it just seemed like the right fit. They were friendly, kind and open to ME. I was so worried about whether they would want me, too.

Bid day came and I could hardly wait. When I opened up my envelope and so the words "Alpha Omicron Pi" I was ecstatic!! They wanted me. I wanted them. I went to the room where all of the girls were waiting and was greeted by the best reception ever. I knew immediately I had made the right choice.

During the next 24 years I slowly became involved as an Alumna. I first started about 10 years after graduation joining an Alumna Chapter. I did a few things here and there with them. The local AC was not a very active and strong group. It waxed and waned over the years. It didn't really give me the opportunities to become close with other sisters after college.

7 years ago one of my pledge sisters contacted me. She was heading up the Corporation Board for our chapter's new home. We had never had a house before so this was a big deal. She asked me to help. So, for the past 6 years I have been the VP of the Corporation Board. It has given me the chance to feel like I am involved again. Now, it is far from a popular position. It does not make you the most desireable person to the collegiates. I didn't mind, because I have always loved my sisterhood. I knew that, in the long run, I was helping to give back.

Now, is where I get to the part of being alone. In all of these years I have always been involved on the periphial. I have not been the most visible AOII around campus or meetings. I have done fulfilled my responsibilities proudly. (That is what made it easy to become a Life Loyal, the pride I have in being an AOII.)

For many, many years I have wanted to attend an International Convention. It is something I have never had the opportunity or, truth be told, the confidence to do. As proud as I am of being an AOII, I am insecure in being active.

I sit here, form filled out, waiting to push the submit button on my first IC registration and I am terrified. I don't know anyone personally who is going to IC and staying at the hotel. I so want to be totally immersed in this experience, but I worry about being alone in a room full of sisters. It is kind of like being the new kid at school. Where do you sit at a meal? Who will say hello to you as you walk in the room? Will you be accepted and welcomed or alone on the side??

Silly.

But true.

I can't wait to go to my first IC. Regardless of my feelings of insecurity, I am GOING! I am going to do my best to put myself into the fray. -to put myself into the conversaion. -to once again walk into that room full of sisters and feel so excited to be one of the group of women that I have always so loved. I am looking forward, with much excitement and fear, to being a wanted and welcomed member of my sisterhood again.

I love Alpha Omicron Pi, it's ideals, values and members.

International Convention... here I come.


YIKES!!