And the wait goes on.....

Reminds me a little of a bad Sonny and Cher song.. and the wait goes on... and the wait goes on and on....

Yes, I am old enough to have sat and watched the Sonny and Cher show. Heck... I wished I could grow my hair all the way to my butt back then. My mother was NO fun!! She cut my hair into an UGLY pixie!! Yikes!!


Can you tell the wait is starting to cause my little brain to go in a million directions? Actually, all of these directions, yet I am constantly pulled back to this crazy wait.

I have been reading the sites... trying to work my voodoo magic on the bad rumors to make them go away. I am finding out rather fast that my voodoo magic is not that effective... OR it is really backfiring on me. It seems the good rumors are quickly disappearing. I sit back and reflect on the carefree days of bliss when folks were chanting "All of July in July!" Where have those days gone?? I have continued the chant, though I think I am singing a solo now. Deep down inside I know it is only a pipe dream... like growing my hair to my butt was... but gosh darn it... I can't let go of the dream!! I think I will just build a little protective cocoon around my dream for as long as possible.

Okay... now that I am safe and sound inside my dream.... I am going to add to my chant.. All of August in August??? hmmm.... that would be nice.

I think, besides the obvious frustration with the unexpected lengthy wait, my frustrations come from knowing our dossier was sent to China on July 22nd and then... unexplainably not logged in until August 24th. I feel a little cheated. I know... blah, blah, blah... everything has a reason, it will happen when it is supposed to, she isn't ready.. AHHHHHH!!!!!!!

So... retail therapy helped for a few weeks. Secret pal shopping helped scratch the itch for a few days. Sitting in her half decorated room helps ease the frustrations for a few hours. I am ready. I know it isn't my turn, but I am ready.

I am ready for a few things....
* predicitablity
* a completed nursery
* July referrals
* no more rumors, just facts
* to win the lottery so I will be independently wealthy
* to see my daughter's picture
* to know I will have a daughter and not wonder if another surprise will happen
* to start moving forward again instead of running in place


I am ready. Bring on referrals.