Difficult Questions

I was off reading different blogs from other adoptive families and one post caught my eye. It was about difficult questions are children have or will ask. That post pushed me to write now.

Riley has started to ask some difficult questions. He is 5 years old now, and has been home for half of his life. I don't know why I wasn't ready for these questions, but I wasn't. Now, the conversations they have brought between us are so precious and meaningful. They have helped me to find my way as well as help him find his way.

One question Riley has asked quite a bit is about whether he grew in my body. I have told him he grew in his birth mother's body, but now mine. I also have told him that James is the only baby that grew in me. I think it is important for him to know this. He has asked if he came out of my body. Again, I have had to try to explain to him how things actually happened. It is really such a difficult concept for a small child to try to wrap his brain around. He is slowly getting it.

The other question that came up recently was about baby pictures. Riley was looking at a picture of Jerry and I holding James at his baptism. James was baptized when he was less than a month old. Riley asked me if the baby in the picture was him. I told him that it was James. Then I showed him a picture of his baptism. Riley then asked where was his baby picture. I then told Riley that the youngest picture we have of him was right before he turned 2 years old. I told him that he didn't come home until he was 2 and a half so we don't have any baby pictures of him. I explained that we have 2 year old pictures. We talked about how 2 years old is still a little one. He seemed comfortable with the explanation, but it broke my heart.

You see, we have a picture of Madeline at 6 weeks old. That is a baby picture. We have pictures of her at 7 months old. Again, that is still really young. Of course, we have pictures of James from before he was born (ultrasound) up to his current age.

At some point in time, I think, this may be something that hurts Riley's heart. He is the only one we don't have baby pictures of. That is tough. I think about the little "fun" activities I have participated in where you bring in a baby picture and everyone tries to guess who it is. He doesn't have a baby picture. I guess I never thought about that before. Maybe that "game" is not such a good one.... maybe insensitive...

So... this has me thinking.... and learning... and growing as a mother.

Tough concepts, difficult questions.... enveloping him in love and answering his questions, while giving him a strong faith to turn to is all I have.

The ABC's of Me!

A- Available or taken?
Taken... DH and I have been together for 20 years and married for 16 years!

B- Best Friend?
My husband is my best friend... though my friend Kathy is my closest girl friend

C- Cake or Pie?
Cake all the way... I am not a fan of pies at all!

D- Drink of Choice?
Water, sweetend iced tea w/o lemon, Dr. Pepper, hot tea

E- Essential Item?
diaper bag! Madeline is still in diapers so without it we are in deep... well, you know.

F- Favorite Color?
Blue

G- Gummi Bears or Worms?
I am not much of a candy fan, but would have to choose Gummi Bears if I had to pick

H- Hometown?
Land O' Lakes, FL

I- Indulgence?
Silly as it may sound... shopping for my kids. I love it!


J- January or February?
Probably February... I love when Spring is upon us

K- Kids and names?
James, Riley and Madeline

L- Life is incomplete without?
My family

M- Marriage Date?
June 16, 1990

N- Number of Siblings?
2 sisters

O- Oranges or apples?
Apples... I only like orange juice.. the consistency of an orange is NOT for me!

P- Phobias/Fears?
I am extremely clausterphobic.

Q- Favorite Quote?
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11

R- Reason to Smile?
My family

S- Season?
Fall

T- Tag three people!
-anyone who would like to do this.

U- Unkown Fact About Me?
I am very self conscious, and therefore have only a few very close friends.

V- Vegetable you hate?
The list would be far to long...

W- Worst habit?
Procrastination and I live in a state of organized disarry. I can find what I need but it drives others crazy

X- X-Rays you've had?
arm, neck, teeth

Y- Your favorite food?
Chicken Parm.

Z- Zodiac?
Virgo

Okay.... I LOVE Blogthings

Your Vocabulary Score: A-

Congratulations on your multifarious vocabulary! You must be quite an erudite person.

How's Your Vocabulary?

You Are Cookie Monster

Misunderstood as a primal monster, you're a true hedonist with a huge sweet tooth. You are usually feeling: Hungry. Cookies are preferred, but you'll eat anything if cookies aren't around. You are famous for: Your slightly crazy eyes and usual way of speaking How you live your life: In the moment. "Me want COOKIE!"

The Sesame Street Personality Quiz

Thankful Thoughts

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived, what God has prepared for those who love Him." -1 Corinthians 2:9


"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all of your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." -Proverbs 3:5-6