A dark cloud......

On Thursday morning my cell phone rang at 7:15 am. It was Jerry. His sister had called to say she could not wake their mother. She was breathing, had a high fever but was not responding. The Hospice nurse came to the house and said the end was near but it may not be today. At 8:30 am, while teaching my 5th grade class, my cell phone rang again. It was Jerry. He was already at his mother's home. She had passed away. Wow. I immediately buzzed the office and asked for coverage, found my principal and left as quickly as possible to get to Jerry. I left James at school, not knowing what I was walking in to.

Upon arriving at the house all but one of Jerry's siblings had already arrived. His one brother had an hour drive. All of the spouses were already there. Jerry walked over to me and collapsed into my arms. It was so heartbreaking. I wished there was something, anything I could do to help this pain go away. After spending a few minutes, just us we approached the rest of the family.

I then learned that Hospice was on their way. Jerry's mother was still in the house. One by one the siblings took turns spending time with their mother. After Jerry's brother arrived, the funeral home was called. Thank God I did not bring James with me!!

Well, needless to say, the days since then have all run together. We are making plans, writing down thoughts, organizing life to the best of our abilities. We are all spending every moment possible together. We are being the best support system we can to each other.

We are also trying to help our children understand what has happened. James has his weepy moments. Today he was just plain ornery. That is to be expected. Riley is completely confused. He is constantly looking for his grandmother. He will go in her room, look under her pillows, behind her chair, in her bathroom. We have told him she died and is in heaven. A three year old really can't understand. Heck, honestly, I don't think anyone really understands.

We are a family... living through a very dark cloud... counting the days until all of the obligatory actions are completed so we can learn to live as a family again...