A Friend

You know, sometimes it is hard to know how to be a friend. It is not easy to see things black and white. I am struggling with friendships right now. Struggling, not in having or making friends, but in being the friend I can be to others and allowing them to be a friend to me.

Kids make friends easily. They also move on from friend to friend in a more carefree manner. They run, play, laugh, disagree and squabble. They know when to take their toys and go home. They understand that sometimes you aren't friends with someone anymore. They may be sad when a friendship ends, but they openly make new friends.

I think if I decided to write a personal plan for improvement I would include a friend category. I am not a good friend maker. I have very few true friends in my life. I have written about friendship disappointments in the past here and that is not what this is about.

Currently in my life I feel like I have these little friendship circles. All of them interesting, but not much for me... just me... as a person. I go to activities like Bunco and Girl's Night Out. It is always fun. I have my one best friend from college, my sorority sister, whom I love with all my heart, though our lives are vastly different now. I have co-workers who I enjoy tremendously, laugh and goof with, but not connected with.

Maybe adult friendships, for me, are not the deep ones. I would LOVE to have a best friend. That may be the little girl in me coming through, but to have someone to giggle with, complain about my husband to, listen to, share glories and defeats with, would be nice. I think I would be in girlfriend heaven if that happened.

Currently, I have friends, but no a deep connection. I don't pick up the phone and chat about life with anyone. I look at friendships more from an outsiders perspective. I don't feel jealous or envious of other people's relationships because I am so glad they have found that connection with another person.


Maybe having a best friend is more of a childhood activity. Truly, my best friend is my husband, though having a woman's perspective to tap in to would be nice. I tell my husband just about everything. I love him to bits. He is kind, patient, loving, ornery, stubborn... all of the things I love in a man. He is my best friend on so many levels... but not what I am looking for in a girlfriend. I think the testosterone may get in the way of sharing pedicures and PMS talk.

Maybe I should take out a want ad.

Wanted
1-best friend

Qualifications:
quirky, patient listener who likes to laugh and share and is willing to make an effort to be a friend
No prior experience necessary
All interested applicants will be considered
Prefer non-smoker


PS Must be willing to pretend to laugh at my really bad jokes and not like the lemons to lemonade analogy! (HA!)